Heaven Confirmed, Hell Panicked, and I Took Notes

Today has been one of those days that makes you want to hit “pause” and stay in it forever. The sun is golden, the air smells like leaves and laundry detergent (only because my laundry is hanging outside like a scene from Little House on the Prairie), and my kitchen smells like pure comfort....I’ve got chicken stock simmering from the leftover rotisserie carcasses. (No, it's not gross....it's resourceful :) ). Besides, that stock will be the base for my famous chicken soup. You know the one......the kind that can heal your cold and your heartbreak....and possibly even your credit score.  

It’s been a perfect fall day!

But can I tell you something that may seem a little goofy? I almost didn’t want to wake up. I was having one of those good dreams.....the kind you want to grab by the collar and bring with you when you open your eyes.

In my dream, I was walking a bunch of little kids down to the kindergarten rooms in my old school. (Don’t ask me where the kids came from...or who they belonged to.  Dream logic.) I told them we had to go a different way because they had done some construction, and things weren’t the same anymore. But when we got downstairs, it wasn’t classrooms… it was this nostalgic little café. I’m talking vintage cafeteria pizza vibes. I could practically smell that rectangle pizza slice with the perfectly fake cheese. And right next to it (this one still baffles me) was an old-school Subway. Now, I’m not even a Subway girl like that. But in the dream, it felt exciting. Like childlike excitement, the kind you forget about until it shows up and makes you grin in your sleep.

I woke up smiling and hungry for that pizza! 

I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe God was using that silly, fun dream to remind me that even when the path changes.....when the familiar places look different.....He can still fill them with joy, comfort, and something that stirs your heart again.

Last night, though… WHEW! God really showed up and showed out. I had been asking Him for very specific clarification, and He answered in ways that only He could. Like, the kind of clarity that makes you sit there with your mouth open, your heart full, and your eyes leaky.

I’m so thankful I obeyed His prompting for a  7-day fast earlier this month. There’s no “cute way” to say this.....fasting is NOT fun. There’s nothing glamorous about denying yourself food, coffee, and comfort so your spirit can get quiet enough to hear Him clearly. But what came out of it? Peace. Growth. Strength.

It’s changed me in ways I’m still processing.....not because I wasn’t surrendered before, but because He’s refining the surrender that was already there.

And yes… the enemy noticed. There was SERIOUS pushback, and I'm STILL dealing with it.  Because apparently, growth sets off alarms in hell.

One night while praying, I found myself thinking about how things just hit differently when you’re walking closely with God ....not halfway, not lukewarm, but with your heart anchored. When your roots go deep, the winds can blow but they don’t uproot you.

It’s not that the pain disappears.
It’s that peace shows up.

And suddenly, even in the middle of the hard stuff, you find yourself on tiptoe...peeking over your circumstance......and realizing His hand never left.

That’s what this season feels like, actually.  
That quiet confidence that says, “It’s all going to be okay...not because I see the whole picture, but because I trust the One holding the brush.”

So yes.....it’s been a perfect fall day.
A nostalgic dream.
A simmering pot of soup.
A heart at peace in the middle of the unknown.

That’s the real beauty of walking with Him....realizing that even when life changes, His presence doesn’t.

xoxo