Can I be real with you for a minute? Insecurity has been one of those shadows in my life. Not the kind where you’re constantly worried about what people think, but the quieter kind that was planted years ago in childhood and pops its head out every once in a while.
For me, it didn’t always sound like, “You’re not enough.” It was more like being trained to feel less than. To believe my voice didn’t carry the same weight as everyone else’s. To shrink back so others could stay in control....because somewhere along the way, I was taught that if I ever took the lead or had a say, it meant I thought I was better than everyone else. And that was the last thing I ever wanted people to think of me, because it’s so far from the character of my heart. So after a while, I stopped fighting it. I just accepted it as normal.
That’s how insecurity gets rooted. It starts as a wound, but then life has a way of reinforcing it. Toxic patterns in families, being the scapegoat, unhealthy relationships....it all presses in until the lie feels like part of who you are.
And here’s the crazy part: sometimes it’s not even constant. There are seasons where I feel fine, where I’ve moved past it. And then, right when I’m about to take a step forward, insecurity shows up out of nowhere. It's paralyzing and very VERY heavy.
It’s like it knows. The moment I lean into growth, or obedience, or courage - it whispers “Who do you think you are? They don’t want you here.”
That’s not a coincidence! That’s strategy. Insecurity rises up at the exact moment it feels most threatened - because if it can keep you from moving forward, it can keep you stuck.
Now, this part is hard to admit, but insecurity and pride are weirdly connected. Not pride in the arrogant way, but pride in the self-focused way. Pride says, “Look at me.” Insecurity says, “I’ll never be enough.” They’re different sides of the same coin, both keeping the spotlight on me.
And that’s where oppression sneaks in. Because as long as my eyes are stuck on myself - my fears, my shortcomings, my rejection......they’re not fixed on Jesus.
OUCH!
Insecurity isn’t who I am. It’s not my identity.
It’s a stronghold.
When it shows up, I’ve had to stop saying, “That’s just the way I am.” Instead, it needs to be called out for what it is - a lie designed to keep me small.
Talk back to it with truth - “I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am chosen, holy, and beloved. I am more than a conqueror through Christ.” (Ps. 139:14, Col. 3:12, Rom. 8:37).
And even when I don’t feel strong, I need to remind myself that I still carry authority in Christ. I don’t have to bow to the weight of oppression. I can resist it, break the chains, and take back what the enemy has tried to hold over me (Luke 10:19).
Most of all......I need to keep moving.
Because if insecurity shows up when I’m about to grow, then that means a breakthrough is right on the other side.
Friend, if you’ve been the scapegoat… if you’ve carried the weight of insecurity for so long that it feels like part of you… hear me: THAT IS NOT WHO YOU ARE.
You are not “less than.” You are not unwanted. You are not small.
The spirit of oppression may try to keep you bound, but where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom (2 Cor. 3:17).
Keep stepping forward.
Keep lifting your eyes.
Insecurity doesn’t get the final word.
Jesus does.
And He calls you chosen. He calls you loved. He calls you free.
Part two on this tomorrow! I’ve got a LOT to say!
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