Joy Over Junk

Have you ever been around someone that, no matter what day it was, they always seem to find the cloud in every silver lining? There’s ALWAYS something wrong, something unfair, something disappointing. Being around a chronic complainer can feel like carrying someone else’s backpack full of bricks. You start out light, but before long you’re heavy and tired, and.......it’s not even your weight to carry.

I’ve often wondered.....where does that constant need to complain even come from? 

Most of the time, it isn’t just about the weather, or the long line at the store. 

It’s goes deeper than that. 

More often than not, complaining is a symptom of something festering inside.  It could be from old wounds that never healed, bitterness that got comfortable, or perhaps just a habit of seeing the world through a gray lens. 

It becomes the air they breathe, and so they breathe it out, too.

And when you’re around it, it’s easy to get sucked in.

Maybe you find yourself shaking your head in agreement or adding your own little complaints to the pile. Or ....maybe you jump into fix-it mode, trying to find a solution so they’ll finally be quiet (I'm raising my hand here and calling myself out!  GUILTY!). Either way though, it doesn’t leave you refreshed. It leaves you drained, frustrated, or even resentful.

So what do you do? Honestly, I’ve had to learn the hard way that I’m not responsible for fixing every negative person I cross paths with. I can love them without letting their constant complaining dictate my mood. Sometimes that means gently redirecting the conversation, sometimes it means just smiling and not adding fuel to their fire, and sometimes......it even means pulling back and limiting my time with them altogether. 

That’s not unkind or unloving, it's healthy.

And on my end, the best antidote I’ve found is gratitude. When someone starts spiraling into “everything’s awful,” I try to ground myself in what’s good.....like what God has done, what’s still beautiful, what I can thank Him for right now. 

Gratitude is like a shield against the pull of negativity!

The reality is that complainers will ALWAYS be around. 

But whether or not their words take root in me?  Well THAT'S choice....OF MINE. And I’d rather choose joy, peace, and thankfulness than let someone else’s bitterness become my soundtrack.